I only had about a gazillion things to do today, of course! But when I saw them getting out of the pick-up truck on the highway, I kinda knew I might not get a fast start on my day. Sure enough, they began to try to flag drivers down as they walked along the shoulder. I drove by, turned around at the next driveway and went back, slowing as I approached them..."Could you give us a ride?" "Sure," I smiled and in they crawled. The town they wanted was one town over but it was no big deal. Actually, they wanted to go across the river from that town but still...work would wait, right?One was blonde, one brunette, and I would say they were in their early 20's. Whenever I pick up a girl, I can't help but remember the day I was the one walking the shoulder, feeling lost and alone, and someone was kind to me. I love random kindness.
They immediately began to thank me and then launched into apologies for the bother. "No problem," I said. Then they broke my heart. The blonde apologized by saying, "I know we smell like cigarettes because we smoke and I'm sorry because you smell so good and..." My heart cracked. It was just that simple. Why do people feel the need to apologize for being themselves? Maybe because most of us are so used to being judged? I explained that they were fine and no apologies were necessary. But they continued. They apologized for needing a ride, for making me late for work. I shrugged and said it was really no big deal; I was happy to do it. Then came THE QUESTION.
"Are you a Christian?"
I always cringe at this point.
"Not your typical one," I said with self-deprecation.
That caught the blonde off guard. "Don't you go to church?" she queried.
"I do, but I like to think I'm not legalistic," I answered with a grin.
"It's about GRACE," the brunette chimed in from the back.
I immediately turned and shook her hand and said, "YES! It's about GRACE!"
"I read that book," she said. And I KNEW, I JUST KNEW what was coming. "The one by that Mc...guy." "Steve McVey?" I asked. "I know him!" I laughed.
And then she started to cry. And she cried as she told me how the grace message had CHANGED HER LIFE. How for the first time she understood that God loved and accepted her unconditionally. How she had grown up churched but that hearing grace had set her free. And she kept saying through her tears, "I just can't believe this! This is God!" And I just grinned because of course it was.
I let them out on a street they asked me not to drive down in a not so great part of town. I handed them some cash and told them where they could find me if they ever needed help. They were crying as I drove away.
Scotty used to say, "You won't be around me and not be changed." The more I understand grace, the more I'm pretty sure I know what he meant. You won't be around the CHRIST in me and not be changed.
See, I don't have to save or judge the world.
I just get to love them.
And, yeah, that is God.
"This is how much God loved the world: He gave his Son, his one and only Son. And this is why: so that no one need be destroyed; by believing in him, anyone can have a whole and lasting life. God didn't go to all the trouble of sending his Son merely to point an accusing finger, telling the world how bad it was. He came to help, to put the world right again." John 3:16-17.
Oh! this song is grooooovy!!! :)
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36 comments:
Sweet, most sweet, a God date!!!
YES!!! You so get it! A God date, indeed. :D
Thanks so much for this.
You're welcome, bright Tyger... :D
How are things with you? I think of you often. I hope that your days are pain free and your mind is filled with thoughts of how much you are loved. You are ESPECIALLY loved!! :)
Well, I'm trying to get established in the truth, Jamie. Get myself joyful in the midst of pain and stuff. I so want to be "abundant" and get it.
Thanks for thinking about me. That's good to know :)
Sorry about flipping between "Phil" and "tigerbright"...if I'm signed in somewhere else it always comes up with that account.
Wow!!! That must be God-ordained because that sounds like one of those made-up short stories to teach grace. ;)
Phil, no problem. I know who you are! :)
As to "getting it", I think it is a matter of just believing, resting, and having our minds renewed with the washing of the Word. Please be kind to yourself. It is called "growing in grace" and we are all on the same journey, just at different places.
I was wondering of you had read Lifetime Guarantee by Bill Gillham or The Bonsai Conspiracy by Paul Anderson Walsh? I think both of these books would give you some meat to chew on for a while. I highly recommend them.
Grace & love, Phil.
Hey hey Boo Boo!!! Whatcha got in that pic-a-nic basket?!? ;p
I gots enough BIG GOD STUFF happening in my life I don'ts NEED to be making up no stories!! LOL
The Great Commission?? SHEESH! These people just THROW theirselves across your path! Ahahahahaha!!!!
OXOXOXOX
Thanks, Jamie. I have one of those books, though I haven't read it. You know, though, really don't like reading books right now, I haven't for ages. Want to get out of "intellectualizing"! for one, plain just don't feel like for another! Blog posts are much better :)
On a point of doctrine thing, I don't feel like thinking about it,but I've not felt satisfied for a while about the view of the Christian life that says born-again folks having "indwelling sin" and Rom7 ending up being an inevitability type thing. Always feels like saying we don't have two natures is merely a mind trick, 'cos "the flesh" may as well be the other! I find that in folks like Steve McVey. I think Ryan Rufus is closer? I'm certainly hungry. But I don't know. Tooo tired...
Ummmm, truth?? I have never listened to or read either of the Rufus' stuff. I hear they are good but the little I've heard of Rob seems to be rather "signs & wonders" oriented? I couldn't say.
I like the way Bill Gillham deals with identity in his book. Do I have a dual nature? Absolutely not! Do I have ingrained flesh patterns? Yes, but that isn't who I now am in Christ.
As to Romans 7, the great news is it is followed by Romans 8!!! You have to finish Paul's thought. I mean, really, his letter wasn't divided into chapters! Romans 7 is only the prelude to Romans 8 which is Paul's actual point, I think.
Here is what I believe: I have EVERYTHING I need for life & Godliness in Christ. The fullness of God dwells in me. Do I see all of this truth experientially? No. That is why I am growing in grace. Why I renew my mind to the truth of my identity. The problem lies between my ears in what I believe about any given situation. I am prone to look at my circumstances or to let "little foxes" overrun the garden of my mind. That is why we are told to set our minds on things above. We are to live out of what is true of us in the heavenlies. We are to bring heaven to earth in our own experience through faith. Not some big faith, just simple, childlike, resting, abandoned to God faith.
Eh, I meander... :)
I tell you, those two books are worth the read. Mind blowing.
Hey, Phil, I am Sparrow, and I have read your comments here and at Lydia's. I really identify with your wanting to "get it" and get joyful- I definitely feel that quite a bit. I get confused about the indwelling sin and flesh thing too..
At least Christ "gets it" and He lives in us! And we can rejoice in whatever we do understand right now..
Jamie, thank you for the "real" way you talk about grace! It would be great to see many of your posts compiled in a book!
Jamie, hmm. I was really referring to this kind of treatment of Rom 7 . I.e. "unbeliever", and its ramifications.
Hey Sparrow, good to say "hi". Of course, I've read your comments on both blogs too :)
As to the circumstance part, I just feel like I can't properly appraise and wisely act accordingly. Part because I'm too tired, and part, well..?
Mommy! This was amazing!!! I cried reading this. Isn't God always SO surprising and astounding with His Love?! Woooo Wee!
Loooove you!
Becca here. Golly it's odd saying Becca (thanks to you Jamie is how I am known). I quite like the name, but I am not easily cute, but I love affectionate sounding names like that. Something of the stiff upper lip ingrained. I like its reversal. . . If that makes any sense to any of you - ha ha ha.
Anyway PHIL, I totally hear what you are saying! The tiredness. I have only read blogs, but even then, if they are super long my mind will start to meander. . . It's a tiredness for me that causes me difficulty to pick up a thoughtful book, but easy for me to blog or read some fiction. A tired mind that doesn't often want to think too much. One of the few things that has woken it up is opposition. That gets the adrenaline and brains cells moving. My blogs have been far and few between as a result. However, my most recent blog is the result of quite unwillingly pulling a book from the shelf that I didn't really want to read. And as I started reading it and actually forcing my mind to pay attention I was amazed by the similicity and powerful parallels I was reading.
I am not saying I totally know what you are saying. But I have experienced a certain sluggishness that makes me feel as though there is lead in my body. Sometimes I wonder if it is the fact that I really am not getting any cardio. Or that I live in a place where there is no one of like mind (other than my husband), hence I feel very alone people unity wise. Perhaps I am also picking up on the feel of the town I am living in. When cool things happen to me (like what just happened with Jamie and the hitchhikers) I feel so alive. And that does happen. If rather infrequently these days. I know, however, that this will pass and I will be awakened in a much greater way (being that I speak from experience).
So, I blab all this just to say that Jamie could be on to something. In spite of your tiredness and lack of desire, there just may be some special invigorating morsels in those suggested books. Maybe I will actually take her up on it :) Esp Gilham, he's an easy read.
Hi, Becca. (I'll go with "Becca", yes?).
I've had "M.E." like health symptoms, for whatever reasons...bad fatigue, pain etc. Makes concentration hard...That said, I've also done loads of forced reading, "theologizing", even writing a while ago. I've had an obsessively thinking, analyzing mind!..Science background...desire to know, understand the truth etc.
It's not that I wouldn't pick up that book ever. In fact, just yesterday, I got it out of the whole stack of books I put in the garage a few months ago. I just know the gist (like Steve McVey, Terry Rayburn's understanding of "the flesh", their take on Romans 7 ("believer") etc. Ha! I even wrote a paper that I later modified to book length based around arguing the Rom7 man was an unbeliever a few years ago! I don't have it on my laptop anymore...I got rid of lots of stuff because I got tired of my intellectualizing, and the descrepancy I at least felt between heart and head.
Anyways, I don't want to make much of it, because I'm not sure about things myself now...I just feel hungry and not restful like I want...I might post a long comment I wrote in response to Chris Welch's interesting post on "what is the flesh", where I ramble on a bit, but I don't know.
Sorry you feel that sluggishness. You could always try a bit of cardio...doesn't have to be regimented, does it? Fun bike ride or walk with your husband. I can understand the feeling disconnected from like-minded folks, but hey, to have a like-minded "other-whole" is a pretty big blessing! The biggest "grace of life"! Maybe it'll just works for the two of you to get "knit togther" even more.
Hope I'm ok talking like this...I feel like a bit of a kid talking like a big person!
Hey Phil,
It is totally okay talking like that! I do know what you are saying! I so know the blessing of having a like-minded sojourner on this earth, also having these lovely like-minded friends and confidents in blogland is huge! His timing is perfect!
I also know the intellectual. I have been there countless numbers of times! Ha! I kept hearing Him tell me to 'lean not on my understanding' before he opened my eyes to His wonderful gracious gift of Jesus as my everything. How Jesus has gone before me and done everything for me, therefore I can walk in an already finished state. That I can trust Him with everything because I saw how loving and trustworthy He is. That is the rest. Doesn't negate the emotions of occasional loneliness or the desperate longing we experience to bathe in His presence and powerful longing. Eh, the longing is there for a reason! For me it is no doubt that I am graced with a like-minded husband, but even that doesn't remove the longing. Nothing in this world will satisfy. . .
And yeah, I just bought a bike trainer (D isn't much for walks. . . at least out here on the prairies). However, it seems everytime I start to get cardio I get sick the next day. It gets rather tiring, but I am grateful for the respite He gives at random times.
As to the flesh, it's over-rated :). I don't really pay much attention anymore because I find it distracting. . . If that makes sense. Maybe it is the trying to understand it that takes away from the fact that we are born of another seed and the fruit will manifest in its own precious time. . .
And golly, I just read the M.E. symptoms and I have to say that it sounds awfully familiar (since I have moved out to the prairies a year and a half ago). I haven't gone to doctors for it, though it was discovered that I have abnormally high liver enymes for no apparent reason thus far. A few weeks a go I had this day where I actually felt so alive and healthy and thinking clearly. I realized that I have been under some heavy stuff that has been attacking my body. The battle belongs to the Lord. . . This will pass! It just will :)
Sorry, Becca...Pray your better soon. Blood tests came back normal with me years ago. Bit of checking on one thyroid aspect once or twice, but okay apparently.
Hmm on the exercise front. I don't do much, esp cardio. A bit of walking to the shop, and I do actually do a few press-ups/crunches/strength poses now and again when I feel like it. More for aesthetic reasons and a bit of man-exertion of that sort ;) ...I used to do an obsessive amount of sprinting on hard surfaces and weight training before my body shut down on me when I was about 21. I was very tired for a while before, but then it went into total exhaustion.
Not quite sure what you mean by the flesh being over-rated? (Sorry, I'm being a bit quick and stuff cos its nearly 1.00am here and I want to go to bed!) I'm thinking that "the flesh" is just our God-given humanity. It's amoral, we can't live without it...salvation is supposed to free it up to right use. It's not inherently bad, it's good. Grace frees us to be humans as God intended by the Spirit. The problem apart from the gospel is that we have no resources to reign it in to it's God-glorified intent. Under grace, in freedom, we do as he works in us to will and to do...right, the land of sleep calls...
Gotcha. Read my last blog and you might see what I mean. I am off to bed now too - stomach bug. . . Ha ha. By the way jamiekins, I did really enjoy you story too! Goodnight all!
Ok...very fuzzy head right now, but hey... Jamie! Say something!...where be you, lady?!
I'm not sure I'm making much sense to folks, but what I am thinking is that "indwelling sin" is not something the believer has. I don't mean they look externally exactly like their identity in Christ - that they don't sin - I just mean that the problem with "the flesh" is that it doesn't have the resources to manifest life itself, not that it's "infected".
Thus, to be born again is to have our "flesh" - our God-given humanity - set free to manifest the life of the Spirit. Our mortal bodies are "dead because of sin" (Rom8v10), not because their "infected" or "bad" in some way - like because they're not "spirit" or something,(they are "good") - but because they need to be given life by the Spirit, Rom8v11 to be controlled by the Spirit.
Now, believers are always in the Spirit as new creations, so "walking in the Spirit" is not about trying to rest moment by moment so as not to operate out of "flesh" with its "indwelling sin/flesh patterns", it's about recognizing that the flesh has been circumcized once and for all, so is now free to be what it was always meant to be.
Do I make sense? I just feel like there's a lot of "flesh is bad", "humanity is bad" stuff out there, for one reason because people think the bible means "what is not spirit" by "the flesh" - when perhaps the bible means our (inherently good) humanity by "the flesh". And "walking by the flesh"(not a good thing) just means "trying to life out your God-given humanity apart from grace", (where it must necessarily fall to misuse)... rather than "resting to live by spirit through "bad" mind/body". I think it's supposed to be "resting to live by Spirit through good mind, body".
One way you kind of look at the new creation as part born-again - in the spirit, but not the rest. The other, you see yourself as a wholly born-again person, just not consummately manifesting it yet.
I'm thinking, and for example, my experience has been, how much mental pain I've caused myself in one particular area over the years by an undercurrent of "flesh is bad", where you end up denying your God-given humanity because you still kind of think the temptation to sin comes from your humanity itself, as if it was inherently infected. Because you've got indwelling sin. So you end up kind of ascetically seeking to suppress your humanity at that point, rather than embrace it as free to be what it's meant to be. And that's legalism and sin, too
Sin is just the misuse of God-given humanity. The body and mind is the subject, but not the problem. The problem is the self-righteous,self-sufficient, self-glorifying use of it. Rather than the God-righteous, God-sufficient, God-glorified use of it. And what makes the distinction is if we are under grace or not, with a new spirit where we "put off the misdeeds of the flesh" - not by putting off the flesh - but by walking in his love and provision for every aspect of our persons and lives as humans with his life in us. Transformed into the image of Christ that we behold ourselves complete in already.
Ok, I'm going to shut up now ;)
You make sense! That is basically the core of what I just wrote on my blog, which I am not going to post here, as it would be too long. We are born of another seed. We now partake of the fruit of Jesus, born again, born of the Holy Spirit. We are free to eat from the tree of life. We are free, free, free, free! We are New creations living in bodies that will die or be transformed. The body being a temporary abiding place until we receive out glorious body.
So, no, I would not call the body 'bad'. Just dying. . . But the Life that fills this body is pure holy life. And I believe our minds are being renewed to the truth of that! Being on this planet we have been subject to much brainwashing. Certain mindsets have controlled the movement of this body, but as our minds are renewed we moved differently. . . That is why there are many who take offense at freedom, for all they know and all they believe is bondage. But the fact is we are not under bondage. So, this earthen vessel (meaning it merely will turn to dust at its end) contains the most brilliantly wonderful life. And that is why, in spite of sometimes feeling a certain way (such as not super healthy etc) I know that is not who I am.
Before, the high priests had to be without blemish to enter the holy of holies. That also included physical blemish. However, now that Jesus has taken all that, we are now covered with His perfection. There no longer is a veil that seperates even though we live in these temporary bodies. Jesus makes everything Holy, even as our minds are being rewired. . . The Truth is the Truth and I really really really like the Truth. And when I am tired and weary from the onslaught that is the battle against the Truth (aka JEsus, Grace), I love to be reminded of Him, of Everything that Jesus has done for us. That is why I love these blogs. I am reminded and renewed as I read these precious words. I am reminded that Jesus is truly the author and finisher of our faith. He is the molder and He has finished the work! I can walk down the most dangerous street and know that Jesus has already walked this street and is walking this street and I have nothing to fear. The battle is that I have something to fear. That is the lie. It is finished! Paid for. Taken care of! We are free! Sin and death have no hold on me - as He is so are we!
Gee, I love being reminded of this - ha!
Bit too tired now, Becca. Was typing some stuff but I'm whacked out. I did read your post, sis.
I'll take the liberty of posting some great relaxing music instead ;) "Overjoyed"
I'd love to be able to play like this.
Sorry, that link's rubbish...Try again;
"Overjoyed"
HEY, this is COOL!! Look at y'all!!! You make me cry with all this love stuff! REALLY!!!!
And, Becca, actually I think of you as Becs! LOL
I love that diminutive. And you thought Becca was bad. HA
My niece, Lindsay, is Linky Pinky so consider yourself lucky. :D
Jamiekins, huh??? As long as it denotes love, I'm up for it.
...Somebody's birthday around here in 13 days, isn't it?!
OH!!!! IT IS!!!! MINE!!!!!!!!!!!
And I want a chocolate cake with kahlua nut filling and white frosting that says, "Happy Birthday, Santa Baby!" and Santa and a Christmas tree on it!!!!!
AND we will drive to the mountains to cut our Christmas tree which will be TEN FOOT TALL and have a BAJILLION LIGHTS and I will PRAY FOR SNOW while we are there!!!!
I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE MY BIRTHDAY!!! :D
Let me confess...I love any reason to CELEBRATE! I used to have a birthday party complete with cake & balloons for my daughter's stuffed Big Bird. His birthday was August 13. LOL
I'll confess another secret: I'd MUCH RATHER give gifts than receive them. I'm awkward in the receiving. But I LOVE GIVING THEM!!! Haven't you ever wanted to put money on the ground in a shopping center parking lot just to see people's reactions when they find it? Or pay for the person's groceries who is standing behind you in line? Or just do random, crazy kindnesses for strangers? I have that urge quite often. I like to see the surprise on their faces. Why are people surprised by kindness???
MUCH LOVE TO YOU TODAY!
I know who big bird is, but I've never heard of "kahlua" nut and "bajillion" lights! Carrot cake with orange icing and walnuts, or good solid chocolate cake works well for me :)
I think I'm a bit more comfortable giving than receiving, too.
Love to you, too.
PS for a laugh;
hahaha
Oh my, who can resist a laughing baby? It's contagious!!
Funny thing? I've seen a baby go from that kind of laughing to crying in an instant. As if they're just plain worn out and hysterical with emotion.
Carrot cake is Ryan's favorite. Kahlua is a coffee flavored liqueur that flavors the filling. Think YUMMY!!!
It is contagious! The poor kid prob was worn out from it after the camera cut...
Ryan's got taste!..Who'da thought that a vegetable would make for a good cake?!
Yep, Kahlua does ring a vague bell now, just not from my background..maybe I'll try some sometime..
Hey, hey, hey! I love the nicknames, I just feel awkward calling myself the name. It's like how I love it being around lovey dovey people who are affectionate to me, but I would feel self 'gasp' concious being that way with others. One of those fear rejection things, hence remain at a safe distance unless the person is super child-like - then I feel free to be. Or if I am in a lighthearted mood. Not that I think that way in the moment - just one of those retrospect things. . . Some people might call that 'canadian...'
mmm cake. Mmm kahlua, and baileys, and fragelico, and Malibu, and... Ok I stop now! Taste buds gone astray...
WOW! What a wonderful blessing for both the parties... :)
I love LOVE LOVE you Jamie!!!!
Mmmmmm...Becca...you made my mouth water and you also made me crack up...childlike would most definitely describe me, I guess??? To reatin one's sense of wonder and delight in the simplest of pleasures and have AWE over simply EVERYTHING? YES!!! I want to be childlike. :D
Hello, Bino, my brother. I'm overjoyed to SEE YOU AGAIN!!!! It was a rawthuh nifty God thing. I love God things, you know.
And Jul...my first inclination was to brush your comment off with self-deprecation. "I'm just a goof" kind of thing. But on second thought I realized that your simple words made me feel INCREDIBLY LOVED and I needed that right then. Thank you. Sincerely, thank you. Your words meant more than I can convey.
I love, love, love you, too. You are one of my heroes, Grace Warrior. I count your friendship precious and priceless.
You're very welcome Jamie, it just came out and I had to say it! I know lots of other people can relate too, can't wait to finally meet you in person whenever that will be...
I love your childlikeness that comes minus childishness Jamie. Makes sense to this baby that that's the effect of being more mature in grace.
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